今早toastmaster club的humorous speech contest,得了个第三名

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早上一看其他参赛选手,不是一个量级呀,那些爷们都在club里混好多年了,就我一个女生,还初级的。抽签抽到最后一名,虽然大家都觉得我沾光,可伸头一刀,缩头也是一刀,我自己觉得还不如第一个上去呢,害得我多紧张了好几十分钟。
 
最后演讲的时候看见第五分钟绿灯亮了的时候,一紧张还忘词了。一次还罢了,第六分钟换黄灯的时候,我感觉自己要超时,一紧张,又说错一次。哎,没得第一,都是黄绿灯惹的祸。
 
humorous speech,顾名思义就是要逗大家笑,看到别的选手的演讲那么精彩,更让我紧张。
这是我的speech,也逗大家一笑吧。(欺负老公不在这儿,老哥哥们不懂英文)。
—————-

Finding My Mr. Right

“You have four older brothers? You are the only girl? Wow, you must have a life like little princess.”  That’s the typical response I get when I talk about my siblings. [0:12]

Even though I didn’t have a princess’s life, I did benefit a lot because of my 4 older brothers. [0:21]

When I was little girl, we were poor; we didn’t have enough food, especially protein. But nutrition was not a problem for me. My brothers let me have all of the goat’s milk we had, and I also ate a lot of cooked worms and bugs they caught. [0:40]

At school, no one would dare to bully me.  [0:44]

At college, I was admired by my roommates because I could fix almost anything in our dormitory.  It was a piece of cake for me after watching the millions of times that my brothers broke things apart and put things back together. [1:03]

That’s how I remember my childhood today. But when I was a little girl, I felt the other way.  [1:12]

Boys are boys; “naughty” is the best word to describe them. My brothers were no exception. [1:21]

They liked to make fun of me.

·         They liked to see my funny faces when I drank the smelly goat’s milk

·         They liked to hear me screaming when they put wiggly worms on me.

·         They liked to tease me at meal time, made me feel guilty to eat since I didn’t do the farm work as they did. [1:44]

When I was 5 year old, there was a rumor a big flood was coming. They kept on talking about how to escape, and none of them would take me. I ended up with high fever for couple of days. I was almost scared to death.  [2:04]

So I hated my brothers; I wanted to escape from them. I dreamed that Mr. Strong-arm came, defeated my evil brothers and saved me. Someone told me that would only happen in fairy tales. So once I heard that going to a college would lead me to the “outside world”, I made up my mind that I would go to college. At that time, I hadn’t started school yet. [2:40]

I started to live in school from junior high. Even though the meals were terrible, I felt like a captive bird that had been freed from her cage. Every weekend when I went home, my mother would take me with her and she’d talk… and talk… and talk. I was surprised that my mom liked to gossip so much about the boyfriends of my cousins: now, as a mom myself I understand that was her way of trying to influence me to find a boyfriend. I didn’t listen to her, because I already had a very clear picture of my future Mr. Right.  [3:28]

Here is my list:

1.       First, He should be strong, so he could defeat all my brothers

2.       Second, He should always be nice to me.  He’d never tease me.

3.       Third, His hometown should be far-far-away from mine, so I will have excuse not to visit my hometown very often.

4.       Forth, His last name should not be Zhu.  I bet you’re wondering: “Why not Mr. Zhu?”  My next door cousin married “Mr. Zhu”.  Zhu sounds the same as “Pig” in Chinese. Her husband was called “Mr. Pig”, and her kids were called “piglets” and the villagers made fun of them.  I don’t want that happen to me. [4:16]

In high school, I didn’t give any boy a chance; none of them lived far away enough. [4:25]

My college was far away from my hometown, but I decided to enjoy the college life and meet many people before I allowed myself to fall in love with somebody. I had wonderful times except the breaks. Breaks meant going home.  Going home meant 4 older brothers, “Mr. Pig” and the piglets next door, and the long list of boyfriends that my mom was keeping count of.  (5:00) besides those, the trains were usually overflowing with people. It was hard to get on the train and much harder to find a place to sit; on top of that it was a 12 hour ride for me. Luckily I had a companion — there was one guy in my college that came from the same county, so we went back and forth together.  On the train, we shared food and a sitting spot, he loaned his shoulder for naps. After several train journeys, we began to spend more and more time together, oh, yeah, we were dating.  [5:43]

Unfortunately I realized too late that he wasn’t my ideal Mr. Right – the perfect man I was longing for:

1.       First, he was not strong; any of my brothers could defeat him. (6:00)

2.       Second, he is a quiet guy, barely says sweet nothings, he likes to tell the truth, and as you know, the truth is not always a pleasant thing to hear.

3.       Third, his hometown was not far-far-away from mine; our homes were only 20 miles apart.

4.       Forth, his last name was Pig, I mean Zhu. [6:27]

Life is life, full of surprises, I don’t know how my life will be tomorrow, but one thing I am sure of, whenever I need a shoulder to rest against, I will always have one. [6:42]

 


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15 thoughts on “今早toastmaster club的humorous speech contest,得了个第三名

  1. Ying

    Love your speech, humorous but very touching at the end.才女就是才女,不分语种。

  2. Ying

    再加一句,你的讲演很象The Sex and city里Carry的风格,喜欢。

  3. 小米-

    你得第几名都让我崇拜不已,就凭你这英文,读着真是种享受!我觉得收藏了!呵呵!

  4. Qiuyun

    为了准备这次演讲比赛,我几易其稿。我每次都是把上一稿copy and paste,然后放心大胆地该。这个是第五稿。第四稿的时候,我发给一个英国同事帮我看看,他给我改了一些,加了一些常用语,修改了一些句子。有些我采用了,有些我自己觉得别扭,就没用。因为他帮我强调了放假回家要面对的事情,我只好重新梳理,删改了一些其他的,要不然绝对超时。我感觉最舒服的是准备5分半到六分钟的讲稿,现场大概会用到7分钟。可这次我觉得删无可删,6:30一直让我惴惴不安,所以就影响了临场发挥。

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